I saw this amazing article and it inspired me to tell you something about myself. But first you have to go read the article before you continue reading this one. Go click on it now! Go!!
http://cocoperez.com/2009-10-07-crave-attention-drive-a-cupcake
Wasn't that absolutely amazing?! Now that you've obeyed, you are worthy of knowing something about me: I must tell you, that I am the founding President of a club I created in college: Fatties Fo Life. As a freshman, I didn't only indulge myself in junk food- I proudly turned the Freshman 15 into the Freshman 30.
When the club began, we had an inagural meeting: shrek cupcakes, pepperoni pizza, bean dip, tortilla chips, and alcohol. The club required midnight chocolate milkshake runs, in addition to 1am bean dip runs. No craving was to be denied. I had about two other members, who will remain nameless. You aren't worthy of their identities at this point in our relationship.
This year, I was unfortunately ousted in a coup spearheaded by my boyfriend. He said that since I lost the 30 lbs this year, I no longer qualify for presidency. Whatever. I can still clear a plate at a steakhouse AND order desert.
In the name of Fatties fo Life, I'm trading in my Focus for a cupcake. How can you not just smile when you see a cupcake parked in a lot? It'll be the perfect ending to my routine bad work day. I'll come out of the office all pissed and then see my cupcake and become filled with joy. How can that not brighten your day?
Since I am forced to commute on a major interstate highway to get home, I will probably be pissing more people off than pleasing them, since the cupcake maxes out at 7 mph. Whatever. I'll just ghost ride that whip (since I'll have no other choice) all the way back to Seattle.
Sticks and stones may break your bones, but driving a cupcake proves you're a fatty fo life!
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