Is that you, Benjamin Button?

I have yet another affliction I'd like to share with you. Not only was I blessed with a "special" toe, but over the last year, I have developed an interesting skin condition on my hand. It is so interesting in fact, that my sister has now dubbed it, my "Benjamin Button Hand."

You see, it started out as dry skin. I've had cases of eczema every so often so I figured it was just that and it would go away. But it started hurting. And getting dry. And getting wrinkly and gross looking. But it was just in this one spot. "It looks....old!" my sister exclaimed. Hence Benjamin Button.

It took me a long time to finally get it checked out at the dermatologist. Contrary to my sister's pop-culture based medical diagnosis, it turns out I have a condition called dyshidrotic dermatitis, which breaks down certain proteins in my skin cells between my fingers and on my palm. I only have this on one half of my right hand (and I don't recommend googling it).


Nonetheless, this is easily treated with a topical steroid cream. A common, no-big-deal condition.

Lately, I have been out of this cream for a few weeks, which has led my hand to continue its dry, crusty,  journey. I meet a lot of new people at work, and I often shake many a hand and wonder if the other person I'm meeting thinks they are shaking the hand of a field worker, rather than someone that types at a desk all day. I'll never know. At least they got their daily exfoliation.

Sorry I know I'm grossing you out. I digress.

So. Today. I decided it was time to get some more of that topical steroid cream. No more field-worker handshakes. My co-worker came with me to the pharmacy and asked, "What are you picking up?"

I said, "My anti-Benjamin Button Hand Cream." She's privy to its name.

"Oh," she smiled.

"Yes, it will reverse my hand's age in that one spot. My hand will actually go back in time." I laughed and was proud of my cheesy joke. That's when I turned around and saw the pharmacy clerk looking at me, questioning my sanity.

"Have you had this medication before?" he asked quizzically.

"Yes."

"Well the pharmacist would like to see you in counsel."

I guess I must have freaked him out just a little bit. I should have asked if I could shake his hand. :)

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but as you can tell, I really have no shame.