An unnecessary warning

As of yesterday, I have become a huge fan of the website, etsy.com. It's basically an online craft fair, where anyone can host a website to sell their products. And there are some pretty talented people out there! I'm highly considering doing the majority of my holiday shopping on this site.

As I was perusing the holiday section, I came across a Halloween decoration bearing a message that is unnecessary to post on my baked goods, but rather a universally assumed warning:

You can check out the rest of this shop by clicking the link below:
http://www.etsy.com/listing/55981164/i-dare-you-handmade-vintage-style?ref=cat1_gallery_21

In order to finally fulfill one of my New Year's resolutions, I do plan to try my hand at some holiday baking this season. I might just buy these Halloween decorations as a disclaimer for Christmas treats, just in case you are one of the lucky recipients of my baking attempt :o)

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but channeling Julia Childs takes more skill than I possess.

How many can one person have?!

I'm sorry - I know this is vulgar, but I just about peed my pants when I saw it and thought I'd spread the laughter. It's the weekend; time to relax!


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Sticks and stones may break my bones, but remind me not to go to that pharmacy.

Sweet sites for brides and moms - or not

I am neither bride nor mom, but I found both of these websites to be intriguing, as a 25-year-old female in a long-term, committed relationship.

 

www.offbeatbride.com

www.offbeatmama.com

 

While these are things I plan to accomplish in life at some point, I’m definitely content with the status quo of relationship -er-my family (which consists of our little Shiba Inu as our baby).

 

Moving in together definitely gave our relationship a different dynamic in a great way. We rely on each other in a different capacity than we ever have. We take care of each other. And if anything, it has only solidified what we were testing in the first place: is this relationship headed for marriage?

 

I jokingly told my boyfriend as he perused Costco.com for new TV’s, "Hey, you know what else they have on Costco.com?" 

 

He replied, "What?"

 

"A ring section!"

 

He said, “For claiming your in no hurry to get married, you are sure making some outlandish statements.” 

 

I said, “You’re right; I’m not in any hurry to get married. I’m in a hurry to get engaged!” 

 

Stake your claim, dude!

 

But anyway, back to the main purpose, there are some great wedding ideas if this is something you are planning at some point in your future. They have everything from do-it-yourself wedding veils to music suggestions to "wedding porn" where you can peruse other people's "off-beat" weddings. My favorite happens to be the viking wedding now being advertised from their homepage. 

 

I feel that these sites do a great job catering to those who are already mom's or brides-to-be, while also entertaining the non-members of these groups with such articles with their unique spin on such commercially exhausted subjects.

I'm a bit of a hippy, if you haven't guessed that by now, so offering alternative ways to parent and wed are right up my alley. There's nothing wrong with taking the traditionalist route, but I know in my case, I tend to take the path less traveled. 

 

Work + Las Vegas = Pool

Disgusting eye rapist

Traveling to Vegas on business is hard. I've had to make some really tough choices along the way - go to the conference I'm supposed to be at, or go to the pool? Go to the conference I'm supposed to be at, or get a massage? These decisions require extreme discipline that I have found I lack. I went to most of the seminars I planned on attending, but did leave early so I could catch some of the 104 degree rays that eluded Seattle this year.


As I was laying poolside, relaxing and most likely taking in irreversible sun damage which will lead to melanoma in five years, I experienced the unmistakable feeling of eyes on me. Almost at once, I put down my heavy reading (Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea) to find the eyes of my sunbathing neighbor boring into me. He was sitting directly in front of me, which required him to lay his chair back all the way down and turn backwards to accomplish his creepery. This guy not only was Powder's doppelganger, but was somehow some kind of albino hybrid with a hairy back.

But this was not some ordinary hairy back. He had uneven tufts of hair that looked as though they had been attached by a glue stick. Because he insisted on hitting every branch on the way down from the ugly tree, he also proudly donned a faded Tasmanian devil tattoo that looked as though it had been done in his favorite crayola colors. This no less, was located above the last tuft of hair on his shoulder. Sexy beast. I attract the best of them.

After several minutes of being uncomfortably eye raped, I had had enough. "Excuse me!" I said in a tone that made it obvious that his forcible staring was not consensual. Luckily, Powder was smart and turned around before he ignited Muhana Ali. I'm sure he did not want to see the Vegas version of her. I could just imagine the radio calls, "Security, do you copy?! Albino curb stomping at the wave pool. I repeat! Albino curb stomping at wave pool!"

Smart, Powder.

I am off to explore more of what the city has to offer me the third time around. I definitely have more vacation- I mean work week stories up my sleeve, which I will indulge you later. For now, I bid you adieu.

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but the world is safer without igniting Vegas Muhana Ali.