Birthday Mistake #1: Going to Work

I wrote a total of 45 words worth of story (if you can even call it that) at work today. It seemed like the most ardous article of my life. I forgot why it's totally useless to go to work on your birthday, even if it falls on a Thursday. I was absolutely the least productive member of my team, and I didn't even have a good excuse like drinking last night. I took tomorrow off to have a three day weekend, which I'm sure I'll be enjoying in all of its glory. But it's TOMORROW.

Instead I'm sitting in my cubicle watching it rain on Red Robin (my lovely view), making sure the internet still works, and wracking my brain to write the most incredible 45-word blurb known to man. And I pretty much just vomitted on a word doc and put it in the "done" folder.

I've been getting up to go to the water fountain every five minutes, starting conversations with my co-workers about non-work-related things (which include why the greek god Kronos was famous), continuing these conversations past the point of comfort for the sake of not returning to my computer screen, wandering around the halls and pretending I'm going to important meetings, creating odd meeting names and inviting people on outlook to them (which include "Mustache Shaving Event" (this is a REAL story I will be covering)) -- anything to NOT WORK even though I'm AT work.

I also showed up late, took a late lunch and am leaving at my normal time. It's okay though because I'm paid for the projects I complete and not the hours I'm at work -- which I can't say I even did THAT today.

With the way things are going, I'm on my way to being promoted to head of our department.

So lesson learned - in order to save my sanity, and the company payroll, I will not be showing up to work on my birthday next year.

Sticks and Stones may break your bones, but stay home and party like a rockstar.

VOTE FOR BOWSER!

Vote for Bowser in Komo 4's pet photo contest! The pic with the most votes wins the contest. You have to register, but you can opt out of any future emails. You can vote once a day. If we win, we get a weekend in a pet-friendly, waterfront hotel in Bellingham, a pet portrait package and $150! Afterall, he is the cutest dog ever! :)

Hanaween

Max the Blue Meanie

As tired as cloudy weather makes me, I always welcome the change of seasons from Summer to Fall. I love wearing sweaters and curling up on the couch with a cup of tea and a good book. It is the perfect recipe for a relaxing fall afternoon. Maybe it’s the October birthday in me, but I look forward to the turning of leaves, the colorful landscape that will ultimately surround me in my northwest abode.

But what I look forward to over colorful landscapes and relaxing afternoons, is Halloween. My dad has always been big on this day of ghosts and goblins and has passed down this passion to me. My earliest Halloween is documented in family video footage, dressed as a cat (which consisted of black eyeliner marking whiskers on my face, and a headband with cat ears). I was one year old.

But I really started getting into it when I was four. I was a Blue Meanie from the Beatles’ acid-trip cartoon Yellow Submarine. Now, that’s pretty bad ass for a four year-old. That’s a costume that I would rock to this day, if I wasn’t so hell-bent on dressing up as a Jersey Shore cast member. But at the time, I remember my disappointment when neighbors would look at the blue tube socks sewn to my blue hoodie, and my blue face paint and say, “What are you?” I thought everyone was hip to the Yellow Submarine. I didn’t realize just how bad ass I was for loving the Yellow Submarine at that age. Only in hindsight do I see their judgment. I did my best Max impression in the raspiest voice I could muster, “WE SEE SOUND OF MUSIC!” Once the door was opened, this was yelled in place of “Trick or Treat” which confused the neighbors even more. They were probably convinced that my parents were on the same stuff the Beatles were on. After all, their children’s names do translate to flower, sky and water (we are secretly members of Captain Planet).

As a child, none of my other costumes rivaled the Blue Meanie costume. I was bat girl the year after being a Blue Meanie. This was a batman mask, my jean skirt, pink sweater, with a batman button pinned to it.

After that, I was damned to a dark period where I was witch for several years in a row. It was occasionally broken up with a vampire, and one year I traded my witch hat for the Scream killer’s mask instead. But that was the extent of my creativity, if you can call it that.

In high school, it was lame to dress up. I was too cool for trick or treating. Now, I would give anything to not be judged for going door to door for some free candy. I have an insatiable sweet tooth, and look forward to my daily M&M break which happens at 2:30 p.m. at work. It costs money to buy M&Ms that frequently. Times are tough, and I need my free handout.

But back to costumes, once I got to college, it was cool to dress up again. So cool, that Halloween parties became an event that I hosted each year, aptly titled Hanaween. Since my birthday is the 28th, it was always close enough to claim I was a Halloween baby. True Halloween babies always got upset by this and I told them to go suck a tootsie pop. And then I’d steal the wrapper from them if it had an Indian shooting a star.

In college I bought into the whole skank costume phase (I don’t think you have an option); I was a French maid one year, a cop, a slutty lion (you can still be a skank at the top of the food chain, apparently), and finally I got off the ho-train and became my alter-ego, Muhana Ali (a boxer).

In 2008, I was Sarah Palin, but that confused everyone because I look nothing like her and everyone just thought I was an Asian businesswoman, even though I was saying “donchaknow” out the ass. I tried to stay in character all night but after awhile I was getting on my own damn nerves. That woman is just vile.

Last year, I felt like I should have just gone out in a garbage bag. It was a last minute decision to dress up, so I pulled out my adult onesie (yes I had one lying around) and put my hair in pig tails and went as a baby.

This year, I’m going to celebrate my obsession for trash TV and be Snooki from Jersey Shore. While Snooki, some may argue, is equally as irritating as Sarah Palin, their level of intelligence is about equal. The only difference is that Snooki seems nicer than Sarah. And I can be obnoxiously drunk and blame it on my character.

Don't think I forgot about Bowser. This is the one day a year that my boyfriend gave me permission to dress him up. We are buying him a batman dog costume. And yes, I said "we."

Sticks and stones may break my bones but never skip out on celebrating Hanaween!

Bowsie Boo Boo Part II

Bowser is just as vocal and stubborn as his parents!

1:58:09

The San Jose Rock ‘n Roll Half Marathon was just as gratifying to run as my first half in May. I produced my very first Half Marathon PR: 1:58:09! Way better than the goal I had my sights on, as I stated in my last entry (“as long as I beat 2:07:38”). I nearly beat my old time by 10 minutes.

While my last half was partially motivated by running, partially motivated by my mom, I have to say that this one was all about running. I just wanted to prove to myself that I could put my nose to the grindstone and become a faster runner.

I just remember rounding the corner and seeing the finish line clock flashing 1:58 and I think I let out a squeal as I realized I was going to meet my goal of coming in under two hours, and crush my last time. Adrenaline kicked in once again and I went flying past a crowd of people with my arms in the air, celebrating another 13.1 miles conquered.

For my acceptance speech, (ahem) I just want to thank the course for being flat, the cytomax and water stations for being appropriately spaced apart, and GU for making a product called Chomps that tastes like fruit snacks instead of its nasty older brother, GU Gel. I also want to thank the lady who was giving out free bacon along the way, even though she was out by the time I ran by. It was still good for a chuckle, even if it messed up my breathing pattern. Oh and I can’t leave out the runner that thought it was okay to take his shirt off and show the 12,000 other runners his hairy back, which grew in the pattern of a t-shirt. That was just…interesting.

In all seriousness, I had a blast running it with my boyfriend’s brother, wife and my good friend/old Seattle running partner! We decided to make this an annual tradition going forward.

As for the bands, they were so-so. What was more motivating was the energy about the stages rather than the music itself. Blues Traveler was the final band which we didn’t stick around to see. But with that being said, I would love to do another Rock ‘n Roll race series. I have my sights set on Seattle next year, and I’m hoping that it lives up to its Rock ‘n Roll status as far as the music goes.

As for the next race, I’m definitely signing up for some turkey trots, and debating the Seattle Marathon’s half distance. Still, I have no desire to do a full marathon. I commend those that go there, but I can safely say, the marathon bug hasn’t bitten me…yet. 5ks and half marathons are my absolute favorite distances to race.

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but adrenaline will carry you through the finish line.